12:19am

the clock on the wall is ticking; a slow reminder that nothing ever stays the same. everything/everyone is constantly changing, evolving, transforming. dan is sleeping on the couch. i got upset with him because he called nick disgusting. a person is a person, regardless of their physical looks, income, and etc. and so i got upset. maybe i should of explained to him why it bothered me so much but i thought it was best to just leave the situation. and once the spring is replaced by fall- the leaves ablaze with color and slowly making their way to the ground. the branches now bare and naked. what is left? but after the winter the tree will awaken from his slumber and bring forth new life. i wish i had something profound to write but nothing comes to mind. i feel frustrated... am i compromising myself to the point that i am no longer elbert? if said person never changes will i still love/stay with said person? this is a trick question because everyone changes. whether the change is good or bad is up to that person. i know i want to keep changing for the better. i know i can be better. fuck. i cant explain it. i am happy with who i am but i strive to be the best version of myself. i guess it's about striking a balance. give and take. up and down. but i love him. and i will keep trying.